You have no idea how much repair to my shattered self esteem this published note has done. I'm guilty of "cutting the cheese" in a check out line in Costco to the pure astonishment of those around me. It was one of those "sneakies" that makes a public break-for-freedom with no warning till it's already cut-and-run. Only thing you can do is grin and fan the air while saying "so, sorry, giving birth was a big a surprise too". On the downside, no one followed me out and told me I was gorgeous either.